Should we be Facebook friends?

Should you be Facebook friends with the person you are dating? Should exes be Facebook friends? Do you really want the person you are dating or used to date having that much access to you? There is this sexy guy that I have been with for years now. We have always been off and on and now we are off again. I made the mistake of allowing him to be my Facebook friend. He would nag me about my posts and different things like that. I did not pay him any mind I just said if he didn’t like my posts then he needed to delete himself. He threatened to do so and never did. Last night I received a call it seems he sent a friend request to someone in my inner circle. No harm, no foul I mean she is my sister. Well it also seemed he sent one to her best friend and so on and so forth. He was sending friend requests to ladies on my friend list. I was pissed so I confronted him with the question would you mind if I went on your friend list and requesting some of your friends. He responded with a resounding hell no. Yet he was going through my friend list looking for friends. Of course as luck would have it there were all females. Pissed off I lost my cool and cursed him out. I blocked his dumb ass permanently. Stay out my damn yard trolling for new booty.

Anger can be a source of inspiration so I thought about why
initially I was hesitant about allowing him or anyone else I dated to become my Facebook friend. Now although this was the most egregious act committed against me on Facebook there have been other minor incidents. Questioning my whereabouts when I post things like I am off the radar. Let me reiterate something I am single. Single. I am not attached to anyone at the moment. Why should I have to censor myself to appease you? So I have adopted the rule that if we are dating or used to date then no we cannot be Facebook friends. Yes, that is my final answer. I do not need nosy exes or current beaus to be clocking what I say and do. If I wanted all that hoopla I would get a whiny boyfriend. Kill the noise.

Reflecting back I also began thinking about that infamous Let’s Talk About Pep episode where Jacque went snooping on Joel’s
Facebook page. Looking all on his wall and drew certain
assumptions about his posts and the posts of other on his wall. It is his damn page and let’s not forget he is single. Mind your damn business. I have a friend who I used to date and we are still cordial but guess what we are not Facebook friends. I
prefer it that way I have seen too many instances where people have had access and abused it.

Even if I was in a relationship I still do not want to have him as my Facebook friend. Temptation is a killer. Facebook is a new age tool for people to snoop on you. Granted some posts on
people’s walls are completely innocent and sometimes the person making the post has a hidden agenda and leaves a sultry message. If you are with someone and you read a sultry message on their wall you are going to be angry with them. Without any prior
knowledge of the back-story. Now they have to explain how the person it a jilted ex or a playful former flame. Either way you will be hollering about how they need to be deleted. People we take ourselves way to seriously. No one roaming this Earth is your possession you do not own them in any way shape or form. If they want to creep they will creep. If they are wise they will do it off Facebook.

You do not need that much access to a person. Leave some mystery for the imagination. Less is more. You don’t need to know it all and even if you are Facebook friends does not mean you will ever know it all.

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2 thoughts on “Should we be Facebook friends?

  1. Another good post.

    I definitely understand where you are coming from. If you’re going to be catching unnecessary drama by having someone as a FB friend then I definitely agree it’s probably best not to be friends with them on FB.

    Although, if there’s no drama I wouldn’t object to being FB friends with someone I dated or am currently dated. It’s all about anticipating the others persons actions. If you know they are nosy and/or like to keep up drama then it’s best to keep them off the friends list. If you know they aren’t the type of person to start meaningless drama I don’t see a problem with keeping them on the friends list. That’s just me though.

  2. I have ex’s who are fb friends. I respect the fact that they are happy and wish them the best.

    Like JSin (hey babe) said ” It’s all about anticipating the others persons actions. If you know they are nosy and/or like to keep up drama then it’s best to keep them off the friends list. If you know they aren’t the type of person to start meaningless drama I don’t see a problem with keeping them on the friends list.”

    Great post.

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