I come from a big family where I am the oldest and every now and again I feel left out. I also long to be somebody’s favorite. Out of sall my siblings I am often overlooked. Nobody is wondering what is Nye doing let’s see what’s up with her. They always feel I am anti-sociable but it is ot that I don’t feel apart of the mix and haven’ t felt apart of the mix ffora while. I feel a major disconnect within my family and among my friends.
I wonder is it really me since I like to isolate and be by myelf . I do not feel connected at this point. It feels as though no one really cares if I am there or not. My reality may be distorted since I am in emotion mind. I get trapped there sometimes. Maybe I am bein anti-social because I don’t feel welcomed anymore. I have to iniate contact and force my way in. That is not how I operate I hate to be somewhere that I am not wanted.
I used to feel connected but lately I am clinging to my daughter and Mom for comfort. Just been feeling real alone lately. I guess this is geting it out since I have trouble verbalizing how I feel. I keep everything to myself. Can’t help feeling I am airing our dirty laundry but it is how I feel. This is how I express myself through written word.
I just want to fit in among my own family and friends> when I call stop acting as if I am getting on your nerves otherwise I won’t call anymore. I do not force myself onto people.
Are you feeling left out? Do you want to belong? Share yourthoughts down below.