Defining Moment

I was walking by the bus stop and noticed the Trentonian and a picture of a woman with leopard print pants on and braids with a headline that read insult 101. Her attire caught my eye. It truly captured my attention more than the article. I was not sympathetic at all. I am in a stage of growth and change. We need to be more than what we wear. Our clothes are defining how people view us. How can we be taken seriously when we are dressed for the club in an academic or professional atmosphere. Many times I get pulled aside for dressing too sexy. I was pissed how dare they tell me how to dress. It is my prerogative. Or so I thought. I was stagnated sure I wasn’t lacking in the attention department but I was lacking in progress.

I was not going anywhere in my career or life period. My clothes were my downfall and epitomized my failure. So I decided it was time for a serious change. I have updated my wardrobe discarded some sexy items and put club wear in the back of the closet not meant for work. I am covering it up versus letting it all hang out. Using what I had to get what I wanted was getting me nowhere fast.

How can someone take me seriously? When they are distracted by my voluptuous breasts displayed in my low cut top? You do not have to hide your assets but you do not have to advertise them either. I have grown tiresome of being classified a sexy kitten. I am a woman who is both beautiful and intelligent. My intellect was shrouded by my constant need to be sexy. I took being pretty to a whole other level and lost my credibility along the way. In my old job I was a no-nonsense worker. Wore my suits, dresses, and skirts. My work was impeccable and spoke volumes. Yet I had a reputation for dressing too provocatively. Which quieted their perception of me as a professional. I made male co-workers uncomfortable in my presence. I was so ignorant of this I was not aware of this until some years later. I kept wondering why in four years of excellent work I was never in a position of advancement.

So I have adopted a new philosophy my clothes will no longer define who I am. No longer will my look supersede my work ethic. I have a new attitude. I have a shorter do and no patience for failure. Look at my work not me. Anticipate my success not what I am wearing today. I have been picking up signature pieces that are conservative and professional. The gaudy girl is gone that people used to gawk at in the workplace. I will bring sexy back when it is ladies night.

After reading the article I came to this conclusion I do not condone the maintanence man actions or words yet I know our attire sometimes leaves room for interpretation. We need to take our look and persona more seriously for it is a pertinent part of our growth. We should not allow our look to typecast us. Granted we are free to wear what we like yet we have to keep in mind whether or not we want to our look to stagnate or motivate others. Preserve your sexy for the appropriate time.

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3 thoughts on “Defining Moment

  1. When I first got my job with the state. I dress in jeans in a shirt. My work spoke volumes and I knew that despite how I dress my work was great!

    I have to dress business causal now, and I enjoy dressing the part!

    Great post!

  2. This is a great post. What you said is so true. The way people dress says a lot about them and has a lot to do with how people react or respond to them. I’ve seen this happen first hand. If I’m wearing a suit and tie I get smiles and lots of pleasant looks and responses. If I’m just wearing a hoodie, fitted cap and boots people look at me sideways and suspicious. It’s wild how much our appearance and alter people’s perception of us.

    Dressing sexy is a good thing, but it’s all about knowing the right time and place to do it. I’m sure that you are aware of that you are able to use your attire to your benefit. That’s what it’s all about. The way we look and dress and sometimes control they way people will respond to us and the things they may be willing to do for us.

  3. Very interesting, I have also been in the process of changing my visible persona, it applies to men to, I’ve been overdoing the Street Look, just because I can, but for 2112 want to appear more in line with my proffesional demeanor. 🙂

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