Am I limiting myself by dating solely black men? As I am taking this dating hiatus I wonder if I should expand my dating horizon to include men that are not of color. I do not want to be villainous for not being receptive of the idea. I have been infatuated with Black men for quite some time. Especially, chocolate brothers, with that sexy smile, gorgeous face, and big, strong back. Whew! It gives me chills just thinking of my fantasy man.
Yet I cannot help wondering if my fantasy guy is putting a damper on my love life. Could Mr. Right be White? And most importantly is it racist of me to exclude men who are not of color from my mate selection process. Don’t get me wrong I have dated outside my race for sport but not for a serious foundation. In addition, caramel and chocolate place nice together. Why should I shake this harmonious union? And if it is so grand then why do I keep being faced with prospects that don’t meet my standards. Can a White man meet my standards? He can’t if I continue to purposefully exclude him. Shouldn’t love be colorblind? If I cross that line will I be viewed as a sellout? At the end of the day who cares Black men have done it for years. This thought permeates in my soul.
I will admit though that my love for Black love runs deep. It is not just because we have been through so much together and need to continue to compliment one another. Even though, I could almost swear I could see my truth in his pretty brown eyes. I love Black men. I like to think I am open-minded but I think the jury clearly finds me guilty of rejecting love in its purest colorblind form. Now I don’t knock friends who have stepped outside of the color wheel. It’s just either he has not found me or I am hiding out from any potential prospects. In college there was this sexy Italian guy that caught my attention. He was a hopeless romantic. The kind of guy that was attentive to you even the things you didn’t say. I could see something I wanted just laid eyes on it and the next day he would show up to my door with it.
One night he revealed to me his true feelings. I was so shocked. He was enamored with me. Smitten by my kind heart and down to Earth ways. I wouldn’t pursue it though I was afraid. Afraid what people would think. I wonder if that fear still envelopes me. Love is love. Blue eyed or not.
When I end this hiatus I will challenge myself to open the floor to Mr. Right even if he isn’t tall, dark, and handsome. Let’s see how I fair.
Are you limiting yourself to just Black men? Why are you so afraid? Share thoughts below.