Common Mistakes Women Make

There are many fallacies we commit in dating. We know there are problems yet we refuse to address them. You can be factitious with your girls but you cannot continuously lie to yourself. In this post I will address three major mishaps that often occur in relationships. I will also point out the ways to rectify them.

 

Mistake #1

 

Dating men based on your OWN expectations, instead of the REALITY he presents.

 

How many times have you or your girls proclaimed he wasn’t like that in the beginning? You are well aware of whom he is based on his actions yet you take on the arduous task of making and molding him into the man you want him to be. Then, when he reverts back to his old ways you act shocked. We have to stop ignoring a man’s true colors.

 

Play or Be Played Rule #3

 

When a man’s nonverbal language tells you what he is about, you better accept it.

 

Three simple ways to know that he is into you:

 

He makes direct eye contact with you.
He uses elaborate hand gestures when he is talking to you (this exudes confidence in what he is saying).
Everything he is saying to you can actually be verified.

 

Mistake #2

 

Being in denial.

 

This is the biggest mistake women make when dealing with relationship issues. Unfortunately, society has made denial a comfortable place to be. Men are forced to deal with the consequences of their actions immediately. Women on the other hand have temporary safe houses. Denial like cancer eventually catches up to you. Initially you can ignore it, and it continues to take over your body, it eventually becomes inoperable.

 

A woman with game knows how to be honest with HERSELF when she sees that something she is doing in her relationship is wrong. She will immediately rectify the situation at all cost. Even if it means temporary pain, she needs to maintain her sexy for decades to come.

 

Immediate Pleasure vs. Immediate Pain

 

Ladies we have two choices when dealing with immediate pain.

 

Do you?

 

a)      Want to get immediate pleasure, but suffer longtime pain, or

b)  Withstand immediate pain, so that it will lead to long-term pleasure?

 

In many cases, we get so complacent with being in their comfort zone, equate temporary discomfort with pain. Just because it is giving you comfort, doesn’t mean it is good for you in the long run. Never run and hide because the beat goes on with or without you. Thus, leaving you to deal with the effects and consequences of the world around you.

 

 

Mistake #3

 

Don’t try to dominating your relationships.

 

This is rampant in society, but even more so in the black community. There are three categories of relationship power structures:

 

Man-Woman Relationships

 

In this relationship the man and woman are on a leveled playing field. Remember male leadership is not synonymous with female oppression. Let him lead and you support.

 

Father-Daughter Relationships

 

In this relationship the man controls everything. Women in these types of relationships are looking for a Daddy not a man. This is where the Sugar Daddy thrives.

 

Mother-Child Relationships

 

The woman is basically running everything and calling the shots.

 

Tip #5 on how women can have game:
 

Learn to realize and accept when something isn’t working for you. Stop beating a dead horse. Let that horse go.
 

What common mistakes are you making in your relationships? What kind of relationships have or are you in? Share your thoughts below.

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One thought on “Common Mistakes Women Make

  1. Just my two cents worth but I think the “main” mistake is the first one. Going into a relationship, everyone has expectations but I know women who have this “my way or no way” thing going on in that if the relationship ain’t gonna go the way they want it to go, there’s gonna be problems. Then, when the relationship is running on just her expectations – and there’s failure to meet them – then all the other mistakes you mention come into play and then some.

    In this, I would think that women have to be acutely aware of the fact that in a relationship, they’re not the only one in it and not the only one with expectations or, properly, a vision of how the relationship is going to flow.

    Is he into you or not? Well, there’s that expectation thing again; not only does she expect him to be into her, he has to be into her in a particular or specific way and if she doesn’t see that, well, that means he ain’t into her… and that might not be the truth. Reading his body language… okay, that works… if you know how to read someone and, specifically, how to read HIM.

    He’s not making eye contact? What does it mean? Could be something… could be nothing – it could just be him; eye contact like that could bother him or some prior experience soured him on making eye contact. Like, I rarely make eye contact with women because I’ve been told it’s like I’m staring at them and they somehow interpret it as a sexual advance – which ain’t even the case, by the way; my mama taught me to look people in the eye when I talk to them – but I also have reason not to so I don’t get accused of doing something I ain’t doing. Does it mean that if I don’t it with my lady I’m not into her? Nope…

    Hand gestures. See, if you know that the woman had a man who used to swing on her, the one thing you don’t do is make unnecessary movements with your hands; all you have to do is see her flinch to know what the deal is here. Does that mean if he doesn’t gesture he’s not into her? Nope – not everyone talks with their hands for whatever reason.

    Oh, I could go on and on about this! I will end this by saying that the level playing field is an ideal situation but the field is rarely level because some men want to lead but the woman ain’t so much into being submissively supportive.

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